100 Man Cave Rules for Your Man Cave Sign

100 Man Cave Rules for Your Man Cave Sign

Your man cave is the one place in your house where you are completely in charge. Your man cave is your domain. You are the king. You make the rules. Any rules you want.

Some guys like to say, “The only rule is that there are no rules!” If that’s you, more power to you. But in order to keep your space truly yours, we recommend you have at least a few rules.

With that being said, we thought we would help you brainstorm some ideas. Below is a list of 100 man cave rules that can help you write the laws of your kingdom. Some are serious, others are funny. These are just sample rules, so take what you like and leave what you don’t. When you’re done, you can create your own custom man cave rules sign.

Man Cave Rules Sign

100 Man Cave Rules

  1. My cave, my rules
  2. Enter at your own risk
  3. No women (unless they have food)
  4. No children
  5. Dogs welcome
  6. Dogs under 20 pounds are not dogs
  7. No politics
  8. No one sits in my recliner
  9. No light beer
  10. No wine spritzers
  11. No complaining about your fantasy football team
  12. No crying over bad beats (poker)
  13. Must have a beer in hand at all times
  14. Must root for the Steelers, Penguins, and Pirates
  15. No chick flicks
  16. The remote is mine
  17. Junk food is nutrition
  18. Farting and burping is tolerated
  19. The TV is for sports only
  20. Figure skating is not a sport
  21. No Gilmore Girls reruns ever
  22. No talking about feelings
  23. Man decorates man cave
  24. Crying is only permitted after your team loses a playoff game
  25. Scratch where it itches
  26. Toilet seat remains up
  27. Bacon is a vegetable
  28. Loud and unruly behavior is acceptable
  29. They’re not dolls, they’re action figures
  30. “Yes” and “no” are acceptable answers to any question
  31. Free entry with alcohol
  32. Don’t move my tools
  33. No utensils, eat with your hands
  34. No pink
  35. What happens in the man cave, stays in the man cave
  36. Beer pong and flip cup are exercise
  37. Video games are mental exercise
  38. Comic books are classic novels
  39. No wasting beer
  40. Selective hearing only
  41. No flowers
  42. No candles
  43. Bar is open 24/7
  44. Always keep bar stocked
  45. Don’t touch my stuff
  46. Sports cards are not toys, they are sound financial investments
  47. Farts are funny
  48. Absolutely no cheering for the rival team
  49. No pillows on the couch
  50. The refrigerator is for beer only
  51. Cigar smoking is acceptable
  52. Must have thick skin to enter
  53. All issues will be resolved with arm wrestling
  54. Will Ferrell movies are cinematic classics
  55. No “just checking” on the man. He’s fine.
  56. No fighting
  57. Arguing over sports in acceptable
  58. No selfies
  59. You are not required to remove your shoes before entering
  60. No sissy music
  61. No bitching at any time
  62. Showering is optional
  63. Feet are allowed on furniture
  64. Ditka is a god
  65. Don’t take yourself too seriously
  66. When you are in the man cave you are not a doctor, or lawyer, or teacher. You are a man. Act like it.
  67. Leg day is optional
  68. Inside the cave, I am always right. Outside the cave, my wife is always right.
  69. Whatever man says makes perfect sense
  70. No eating salad
  71. Sleeves are optional
  72. Pants are napkins
  73. If you open a beer, finish it
  74. No uninvited guests
  75. Watching football on Sunday counts as going to church
  76. The Holy Trinity is football, beer, and bacon
  77. No man buns
  78. Leave your political correctness at the door
  79. No showing pictures of your kids
  80. Beer is hydration
  81. No “diet” beverages
  82. Cursing and swearing are permitted
  83. No sunglasses at the poker table
  84. Education is important, but football is importanter
  85. No correcting grammar mistakes
  86. Do not steal another man’s seat when he gets up to get beer
  87. No Patriots fans allowed
  88. Gambling is encouraged
  89. No drinks on the pool table
  90. No working or checking your email
  91. Sweatpants are always acceptable attire
  92. No eating gluten-free food without a doctor’s note
  93. If you can’t name the starting offensive line, your opinion doesn’t count
  94. No talking about wives or girlfriends
  95. Vegetables must be dipped in blue cheese or ranch dressing
  96. No looking at the nutrition facts
  97. Nobody cares how cool you were in high school. Keep it to yourself.
  98. Must wear team colors on game day
  99. Rules are not made to be broken
  100. Any disputes, refer to rule #1

Well that’s all 100. We highly recommend not implementing all 100 rules unless you have no friends and plan on using your man cave as your personal Fortress of Solitude.